Into The Weeds

Please remember that is important to be polite. Be careful of what you say on the internet, especially if you're talking to an ass. A certain acquaintance of mine from back in Champaign, let loose quite a diatribe directed towards a local loudmouthed conservative bigot (exhibit B):

Yeah, this seals it.  You're pretty much the biggest 
dumbass in the world. If I ever meet you, I will anally rape 
you.  Not because I'm into that, but just because I'd love to 
see how somebody like you deals with having had a 
homosexual experience.  Hopefully you'll kill yourself.

If you knew the people involved, you'd probably agree with me that this was downright hilarious. Whether or not it was appropriate, is another matter. Somewhat predictably, the dumbass recipient went whole-hog and complaned to the poster's employer and the local police. Luckily, both were understanding and pretty much laughed the incident off. Anyway, be careful out there. I, for one, plan to never threaten anyone with anal rape on the pages of this blog, no matter how hilarious or appropriate it may seem.

There was an episode of the Daily Show a couple of weeks back where my good buddy, governor Rod Blagojevich of Illinois, became the butt of one of their humorous "interviews." This one had something to do with pharmacists refusing to dispense emergency birth control pills or something like that. I thought it was quite hilarious.

For those not familiar with the way this works, the Daily Show calls prospective interviewees up, asking innocently for an interview discussing a serious topic. Of course, the Daily Show is a comedy spoof, so the "interviewer" ends up making the interviewee look like a fool by asking ridiculous questions and making off-the wall statements. Anyway, I thought that maybe I was the only one that found this one particularly noteworthy and funny, since I am a former resident of governor Rod's state and all. However, apparently I am not alone, since it's covered on CNN.com now.

At one point in the interview, a startled Blagojevich looked to 
someone off camera and said, "Is he teasing me or is that legit?"

It seems like Blago is taking it in stride though, and has somewhat of a sense of humor about the thing, which is good.

"It was going to be an interview on contraceptives ... that's all 
I knew about it," Blagojevich laughingly told the St. Louis 
Post-Dispatch in a story for Thursday's editions. "I had no idea 
I was going to be asked if I was 'the gay governor.' "

By now, you probably know about how Gilette's new 5-blade monster, the Fusion, was accurately predicted by the Onion back in 2004. If not, please take the time now to appreciate the irony and humor of that. Let me start out by saying that I've always been a non-electric razor person. Electrics (and yes, I've tried a few) do not produce as long-lasting a shave. They cause more irritation. You really can't use them in the shower (or at least the thought of using an electric appliance in the shower gives one pause). But enough of my anti-electric evangelism. Switching from a regular 2-blade razor to the Mach 3 back in the day was like a difference of night and day for shaving comfort. I'm not exaggerating here. So you can see why I gave in to the hype, and picked up my own Fusion from the CVS this past weekend.

It's a bit intimidating, as you can see from the above image. I do remember thinking the same thing, however, way back when I first tried the Mach 3. It's just such a large surface of sharp metal blades, that it's a tad scary -- even though the science and physics say otherwise. More blades, closer together, reduce the pressure on the skin while shaving. This produces a better shave with far less irritation. The decreased space between the blades (as compared to the Mach 3) probably decrease the chance for cuts, since there's less chance of skin getting caught in between the blades. Those are all things that the commercial says, and every one of them is true.

The shave was comfortable. It was even more comfortable than the Mach 3. This, of course, is the whole point of the new razor, so I wasn't too surprised. I was pleased, but not surprised. The shave was close and smooth. Better than the Mach 3. This increase in "shave quality" was unexpected. Also unexpected, but related, was the fact that facial smoothness is maintained well into the post-shave day. Much longer than my experience with the Mach 3. Now, the downsides. The mysterious "6th blade" on the back of the razor just didn't do it for me. It's oriented in such a way that it's not really convenient to use for trimming. Besides, I don't know about the nooks and crannies on anybody else's face, but the main side of the razor does a good job of getting everywhere. Also, the price is high. This is also to be expected, since that's Gilette's whole motivation for bringing out new razor technology every few years. An excuse to charge more for handles and, more importantly, blades. I'll also take this opportunity to note that I went with the regular Fusion model. Not the goofy thing with the battery inside that vibrates as you shave. As I stated earlier, batteries have no place in my razor.

Overall Grade: A-

Funny sign modification I saw the other day in Lobby 7:

Energy is always conserved!

There was a survey for some national organization or something that listed the cities with the rudest drivers. Boston made the list, of course, but down at #5. The next day's headline in the Boston Herald, in typical Herald-style big lettering on the front page, was "Boston Drivers Not Rude Enough." Appropriate.

For a good portion of last week, for whatever reason (probably something to do with the biblical-style flooding and rain) the traffic light at the end of the BU bridge and Commonwealth Avenue was broken. This caused certain variations in traffic patterns and directional closings that wreaked havoc with the already tenuous traffic balance in that area. The bus trip home one day actually involved my bus (the CT2) making a 3-point turn across Commonwealth Ave. All of this made me chuckle a bit about how we drive here in Boston. Here's some very good advice paraphrased from a guide book (Not For Tourists Guide to Boston):

In Boston, and the surrounding area, squares are not square. They usually have six or seven feeder streets. In high speed situations, roads intersect in "traffic circles," a.k.a. "rotaries." The ability to properly navigatethese dangerous, but efficient interchanges is a source of pride for Boston drivers. And proud they should be. Boston drivers are the best in the country, which is something you will realize once you understand the rules of the road -- a system based on the idea that everyone who learned to drive anywhere else sucks. Some rules:

Be aggressive: Drive the streets of Boston. Don't let the streets drive you. You will often find yourself needing to make four-lane changes in 100 feet, weave in and out of crowded rotaries, or drive at 60mph on narrow roads within inches of the oncoming lane.

"The whites of their eyes": Eye contact and gestures will let you know if they will let you into their lane, are upset that you cut them off, or if they applaud your recent ballsy driving maneuver. This will also be a good opportunity to see if they hate you. Drivers in other cities may inadvertantly cut off others in their race to "get there first," but in Boston, driving is often spite-based ... people will cut you off just for fun.

Check your directions, check them again: If someone tells you to take a right or a left, ask how much of a right or a left. Knowing if you need a turnaround right, hard right, soft right, or straight right makes all the difference.

Commonwealth Avenue: You'll encounter hills, masses of bikers and BU students, legal left turns through three lanes of traffic and two trolley lanes, illegal right turns that everyone takes anyway, green lights that require stopping, and red lights you're expected to know to ignore. Enjoy.

Here are a couple of my favorite sights in thumbnails with links to google maps:

Some good hangin' and chillin' last night at the Dockside, even though we are still mourning the Sox getting their asses swept out of the Hubert H. Humphrey Metrodome. This was only, of course, after we left the dreadful "Sam's Place" tourist trap craphole. Whose idea was that anyway?

And here are some hilarious webcomics. "Lunacy Abounds!"
http://www.marriedtothesea.com
http://www.alienlovespredator.com
I highly recommend both of them for some good chuckles.

I'm a big fan of ASCII art, so I'm going to refer everyone to one of my favorite internet flash animations out there. It's a tour-de-force of ASCII art set to the German metal tune "Feuer Frei." Featuring WTFsubarines, LMAOplanes, ROFLcopters, KTHXcruisemissles, TTYLnukes, and others, it's sure to please!

So lately I've discovered YouTube. I know I'm probably a few months late to the party, but that whole Zidane thing drew me to YouTube. There are always a good bunch of people with too much free time on their hands. here is a compilation of all the mini videos that people made. Some are pretty darn amusing. This one is one of my favorites, but pretty much anything with Fidel Castro is bound to be a little bit funny.

As quoted in the Globe's "Red Sox Notebook" on 7/25, speaking of David Wells' imminent return to the Red Sox following his knee surgery and unfortunate impact with a baseball on same said knee:

"...he's kind of a freak of nature. The [expletive] can come out there and throw strikes. He gets out of bed, has a beer, whatever, he can throw strikes."

I couldn't have said it better myself!

As far as I can tell, the buzz all started with a blog entry by Josh Friedman, a Hollywood screenwriter of some sort. The title of the movie alone, and the fact that none other than Samuel L. Jackson had been cast in the hero role further fueled the flames of desire and speculation for this movie across the blogosphere and the internet. The story goes that after unprecedented "buzz" and fan requests, New Line Cinema added several more days of shooting to "fine tune" the movie and give it an R rating (up from the original PG-13). Rumor has it, that one line added was originally from a fan parody of the proposed movie, where Jackon says (hopefully, quite emphatically): "That's it! I have had it with these motherfucking snakes on this motherfucking plane."

Jackson referred to the movie while presenting the award for Best Picture at the MTV movie awards this year: "This award holds a special place in my heart because next year I'll be winning it for Snakes on a Plane. Now I know, I know that sounds cocky, but I don't give a damn. I'm guaranteeing that Snakes on a Plane will win best movie next year. Does not matter what else is coming out." Anyway, on August 18th, I plan to be in the theater. Trailers have started popping up in theaters and on television, and I've seen a big poster for the movie at the Harvard Square MBTA station.

What is it about this movie that has people so enthralled? I think it's a combination of things. The oh-so-descriptive title for one. The abovementioned blog states that the studio was at one point going to change it to something ordinary and stupid like "Pacific Air Flight 121." Good thing they came to their senses. The presence of Samuel L. Jackson as the star is another big factor. The movie promises a good amount of camp and fun just on those two factors alone -- a "dark, absurdist, surreal comedy" as the Wikipedia article supposes. Anyway, see you all in theaters on August 18th.

I remember first using voice recognition software about 10 years ago. Apparently, the experience is still the same today, as evidenced by this wonderful video of a Microsoft demonstration. I suppose this is one of those things we'll never have. Like flying cars.

Things a Man Should Know About Drinking

Some of my favorites:

• 10. Despite a high ratio of female clientele, an insouciant way with fried mozzarella, and their prevalence in resort towns, establishments where a waitress pours shots into your mouth from a bottle she holsters in a bandolier are fraught with peril.
• 14. Adopt a favorite cocktail on a seasonal basis.
• 18. Instead of ordering a shot of After Shock to cap off the evening, one could just walk calmly into the street, lie down, and wait.
• 26. Avoid bars that use plastic cups, bars whose bathrooms consist solely of a trough-style urinal, bars with chicken wire protecting the band, bars where Patrick Swayze is the bouncer.
• 39. Don't call the bartender Barkeep, Chief, Buddy, or Ace, unless his actual name, in fact, is Barkeep, Chief, Buddy, or Ace.
• 69. When all else fails, have a Martini.

Seen while at UIUC:
Some memory from a small company called "Clearpoint" that Warner had around for Sun Ultras and 220rs. No, really, this isn't a joke.

It's extremely rare that I meet someone who hails from my hometown (Rochester, N.Y.). Last night I did, and we briefly reminisced about Nick Tahoe's garbage plates, good chicken wings, The Distillery, R.I.T. (all bricks, no chicks), The Alexander St. Pub, and other hangouts and such. Brought to mind a funny list that I had come across a while ago. What follows are some selections from "You Know You're From Rochester, NY When...":

• The only thing at the annual May Lilac Festival is snow.
• You can't swim at the beach.
• Toronto is about 70 miles away, but it takes four hours to get there.
• The name "Greater Rochester International Airport" is bigger than the airport itself.
• Your baby's first word is "Wegmans".
• You ask lifetime residents where the George Eastman House is, but they don't know either.
• You order a white hot and a pop, and the counterman knows what you're talking about.
• You can go to any mall on a Saturday and see at least 5 people you either work with, went to school with or dated.
• When 18+ inches of snow falls overnight, but you never thought of NOT going to work.
• You are perplexed when friends from other cities come to visit and want to "see the sights".
• You define summer as three months of bad sledding.
• Halloween is snowed out with great regularity.
• Half the change in your pocket is Canadian, eh.
• The thought of eating a "garbage plate" makes your mouth water.
• The worst four-letter word you could say is "Fuji".
• "Waking up with the Wease" doesn't mean that you have a respiratory infection.
• A flagpole strung with white lights seems like an acceptable alternative to a municipal Christmas tree.

Note: This one's only of interest to my fellow sysadmins.

It's time to revive an old parody from 1997 or so. Imagine this spoken to the same music and in the same voice as Baz Luhrmann's "Wear Sunscreen":

Wear a Leatherman.

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, having a Leatherman would be
it. The long-term benefits of a Leatherman have been proved by BOFHs, whereas
the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering
experience. I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of root. Oh, never mind. You will not understand the
power and beauty of your root access until it's taken away. But trust me, when
you need to kill a runaway process, you'll think back to the scripts you had
and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and
how much you could do. You are not as powerless as you imagine.

Don't worry about the Y2K bug. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective
as trying to mount an old chain of Exabyte tape drives by chewing bubble gum.
The real troubles on your network are apt to be things that never crossed your
worried mind, the kind that get you called in at 4 a.m. on some weekend when
you were supposed to be recovering.

So, as I look out my 15th floor window here at home, my view is polluted by three news helicopters hovering over the city. It turns out that there was a series of "bomb threats" caused by certain devices found at important places throughout the city (near hospitals, on interstates, underneath major bridges, etc.).

The real kicker though, is that this was a publicity stunt gone horribly wrong. Highways were closed, subway lines were shut down, lots of people were late for work, and hundreds of police officers and FBI and ATF agents had to get paid -- all because of a dumb marketing campaign, and a dose of somewhat irrational paranoia.

Now, I hear from jrandall, that he has obtained a video (it was up on youtube, but has since been taken down) that shows them putting the devices up in several places in the city and its surrounding environs. I hear that some people may have been able to watch the video and obtain said devices before the police and bomb squad could arrive. I shall obtain said video shortly and put it back up on the internet in a stable place, so stay tuned, and maybe get ready for some scavenger hunting.

Okay, here's the link to the video. Feel free to go scavenger hunting, everyone:
athf-lightsnipes-boston.flv
Apparently, I just missed one right down the street from me near Fenway Park. The cops are just arriving now to "diffuse" the device.

So, sometimes for entertainment or whatever, I head on over to the virtual midwestern portion of the internet to catch up on the happenings at the University of Illinois, via dailyillini.com, the online manifestation of the school paper. Judging from the opinion columns and news of some sort of dubiously thrown together "race relations symposium" from last week, one would get the impression that the school is a stone's throw away from an all-out race riot. Issues of "The Chief" (which the NCAA has declared a racist mascot fostering a hostile environment, etc. etc.) and the socioeconomic and racial demographics of a large midwestern state school are outside the scope of this blog. But I will share with you the poll of the day. It's supposedly very cold in Champaign-Urbana these days, so the poll asks: "how are you keeping warm?"

Spooning? Drinking Heavily? Burning Textbooks? Glad to see it's still the same old UIUC after all. I was starting to worry they had all gone crazy loco over there. Keep warm, folks.

...about guys with fancy sports cars. Stick with me here folks, trust me it's worth it. Here's a guy, selling his ferrari on ebay. Now, if you go and click on his feedback link (the number next to his ebay id denoting how much feedback he's gotten, currently 66), a list of stuff he's previously bought and sold comes up. So, go ahead, and click right there on the top of the list to see what the last thing was that he bought on ebay. A "pleasant transaction" indeed!.

Whoa. Just Whoa. Here's the story: Some dude at UNC finds out that his girlfriend is cheating on him, with his roomate. So what does he do? Organizes an elaborate 'event' on Valentine's Day (yesterday), where he invites her to a public place on campus (the pit), and tells her she's going to get serenaded by the acapella group. In reality, it's an elaborate plan to break up with her in public, with as many people watching, broadcast across the internet, and the acapella group is singing the Dixie Chicks' "Not Ready to Make Nice."

I picked this little story up off of a Daily Illini Blog entry, and there's apparently going to be full coverage on some UNC campus television show. They've got a nice teaser video of their footage up on their site. Also, of course is the facebook group.

So I wonder, is this all in good fun, or is this just another sign of the fall of western civilization? An elaborate hoax? Over the line? It's hard to actually determine who got the best of who in the ensuing argument, and/or who ends up looking like more of a douchebag. Even if it's a hoax, it's an fairly clever one, and the mob definitely got played. Ahh the internet -- wonderful thing, isn't it?

Some things with which to busy yourself today if you're looking for a diversion:

• RoHS Directives: This topic came up last night in conversation (yes, you know you're in a strange crowd when electronics environmental regulatory regulations come up in conversation). As an IT professional, I've had some experience with the "RoHS" labeling, but had no idea about the details of the specification. Check it out, there are some interesting things there. Particularly the bits about lead-free solder and potential long-term impacts on equipment durability and quality. Is this just the price we have to pay for the future of our environment? I don't know, but it's food for thought. Irregardless, I don't think anyone will argue against restrictions of hexavalent chromium or polybrominated biphenyls in our electronic equipment, and thus in our landfills and in our drinking water.
• Paul Levy's Blog: Not only is Paul Levy the president and CEO of my wife's employer, Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center, he was also a professor of mine at MIT. The actual name of the class escapes me at the moment, but it was an Urban Studies class (course 11, which I eventually got a minor in) involving infrastructure management and planning. We took all sorts of neat field trips to the Deer Island treatment plant and the under-construction new water aqueduct into boston, and we got to check out a jet-cleaning and robotic examination of a 100-year-old hand-built sewer main underneath Cambridge. As the executive director of the MWRA, which was in charge of the so-far-successful Boston Harbor cleanup project, he had a whole lot of interesting stories. From there he went on to be a dean at Harvard Medical School, and then was hired on at Beth Israel. I guess everybody's got a blog these days, eh? His is kind of interesting (although maybe I'm just saying that because I work in a hospital?), and he's got a good sense of humor. His entry on a recent paper-towel-dispenser-change debacle is a real gem. We actually have the same dispensers in our hospital's main corridor, and they pretty much suck. Kristy concurs.
• xkcd: A webcomic of romance, sarcasm, math, and language. Go on, read through the comics, all of them. I promise you'll like it.

From http://flickr.com/photos/jeffcarlson/127632129/:

Running "The" along the side isn't bad typography, but the lack of a visual break between the T and H makes me say, "WTF?"

From: http://www.parade.com/features/070418/touchstones-simpsons.html:

Twenty years ago this week, a yellow family from Springfield, USA, first careened onto TV screens—lampooning American culture with pitch-perfect satire and touching off a new era in television comedy.

On April 19, 1987, The Tracey Ullman Show aired a two-minute animated short by Matt Groening that introduced the world to the Simpsons: Homer, Marge and their spiky-haired children, Bart, Lisa and Maggie.

Happy 20th birthday to The Simpsons!

I know -- nay, I hope, that many of you have already seen this. But, in case you haven't, Heat Vision and Jack was a pilot for a comedic sci-fi show that was pitched to FOX back in 1999. It was directed by Ben Stiller, and stars Jack Black as a former astronaut who has gained superintelligence. It also features Owen Wilson as the voice of a talking motorcycle, and Ron Silver as himself -- an actor who also happens to be a villainous assassin working for NASA.

Trust me, it's good. And according to the Wikipedia article (and I definitely trust everything I read on Wikipedia), there's a movie script in the works.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6lWgXDOAJ5s

Rev. Jerry Falwell dies at age 73.

And from Daily Kos today:

Falwell blames 'pagans, abortionists, gays, feminists, lesbians' for death

(ANS, The Afterlife) Echoing his comments made after 9-11 that the terrorist attack was caused by a litany of "evil forces," the late Jerry Falwell said today from the afterlife that "pagans, abortionists, gays, feminists, lesbians, the ACLU, People for the American Way, Al Gore, Daily Kos and other immoral, liberal groups and individuals bear full responsibility for the heart attack that has claimed my earthly life."

Falwell went to add that, unlike his apology following his post-9-11 comments, he will "not be apologizing this time because there are no liberals where I'm going. So they can kiss my fat, dead ass."

So, take that roo roo and mrhe

http://www.hotchickswithdouchebags.com

Don't say I didn't warn you about this one. You'll be flipping through it and laughing for hours to come.

Wow, I'm a blogging machine today, aren't I?

This one url exemplifies everything that is wrong with myspace, and why I refuse to take part in it. It's horrible, horrible, horrible, but go on and click it -- you know you want to! Thanks to Hot Chicks With Douchebags for the heads-up.

Enjoy. Or not:

Perfect:

When re-installing my MIT "personal certificate" tonight, this awesome message popped up:

After seven years, I guess it might finally be time to change my athena password.

For two or three years around the turn of the 21st century, there was a show on the Kids' WB called Histeria. Something about the wacky humor, somewhat bizarre cultural references (including to Pee Wee's Playhouse, Justice League, Monty Python, and others) mixed with a genuine approach to teaching history to kids stuck watching TV got me hooked on it.

Some of my favorite bits that I can remember off of the top of my head include:

• Episode 24: Pee Wee Herman-like character as General Sherman -- complete with full intro song "Sherman's Campsite" set to the tune of "Pee Wee's Playhouse."
• Episode 2: An entire song-and-dance number about Philo Farnsworth, the under appreciated inventor of television.
• Episode 41: The Yalta conference represented as Stalin, Churchill, and FDR fighting over a bunch of food.

The good news is that, even though the show has been off the air for several years now, we can still enjoy it through the magic of the internet. AOL Time Warner put Histeria, as well as several other shows up on the AOL Video website. Check it out at http://video.aol.com/video-category/histeria/1576.

So finally, several months after folks started pestering me about "this show that I absolutely neeeeed to watch," I acquired all 12 episodes of the 1st season of Flight of the Conchords.

The show centers on the antics and exploits of two gentlemen from New Zealand (Bret and Jemaine), and their manager (Murray -- also a deputy attache at the New Zealand consulate), as they try desperately to break into the U.S. music scene. Bret and Jemaine are actually played by Bret McKenzie and Jemaine Clement as a fictional version of themselves. Prior to the show on HBO, the real-life duo Flight of the Conchords played at various comedy stages and folk festivals.

This is really funny stuff. I watched it for about 3 hours straight last night to finish up all of the episodes I hadn't seen yet. My favorites are:

• Episode 3 ("mugged"): Primarily for the "Hip-Hopopotamus vs. The Rhymenocerous" song
• Episode 6 ("bowie"): The sheer hilariousness of Jemaine playing an imaginary / dream David Bowie coming to Bret in his sleep, and then going out into space for a musical interlude
• Episode 7 ("drive by"): Brit and Jemaine confront supposed anti-New-Zealander racism, and learn how to "flip the bird"
• Episode 11 ("the actor"): There's an awesome Lord of the Rings musical video number in this one. I was falling off my chair.

If anyone needs a copy of the season, let me know. I have it out there on the internet and can give you access to download it if you ask nicely.

So, while I'm staying here at the Marriott Courtyard in San Francisco, I get the USA TODAY for free every morning (yes, it's a rag). Yesterday's featured a little blurb on the front about the presidential candidates and their kids.

It turns out that Mitt Romney (former republican governor of Massachusetts, and everyone's favorite Mormon), named his kid Tagg. Mitt and Tagg. Anyway, that's a douchebaggy name if I ever heard one. Just thought I'd share.

If you haven't seen this already, click it right now. Go ahead. It's awesome and hilarious -- awesomely hilarious. As Erin said: "Jonathan Papelbon strikes me as someone with ADHD who was never given Ritalin... and the world is better for it!" Also, Big Papi is a bedazzler -- who would have thunk it?

In honor and observance of the Writer's Strike currently going on, here is my version of a "clip show." This blog has over 175 entries now, some good, some bad, some awesome. I know there are several new readers here, and it's a pain to sift through the entire blog to find the good nuggets. Here, in my opinion, are the 15 most worthy entries if you're flipping through this place I like to call "Into the Weeds":

• yuck: Cold Stone Creamery Rant
• The Soul of the Commuter: Commuting sucks. In very many ways. Here I get back to my urban studies roots.
• UIUC Mail Server Disaster: A tale of sysadmin sorrow from 2002
• Trivia: See if you can identify who all of these footnotes to history are.
• The Cult of Scientology: Mini-rant and link to a freaking awesome article on scientolgy.
• Longwood Towers: Rant about why the Longwood Towers Condominiums are some place you should not be thinking about living in.
• Kozmo.com: : Classic tale of dot-bomb woe. Ever wonder what that "kozmo" box is that's sitting in the kitchen lounge on second west?
• Florence Co. ADMAX: Crazy terrorist prison in Colorado with all sorts of nasties inside.
• New Apartment: Check out the awesome view from my living room.
• Driving in Boston: A primer, with scary crazy maps of intersections.
• Captain Al Haynes: The amazing story of Capt. Haynes and United flight 232.
• Firefighting Mode: Some systems philosophy, and the condition of what things were like back when I worked at MIT IS&T.
• The Switch: Mac vs. PC
• Unofficial!!!!: The crazyness at UIUC known as "Unofficial St. Patrick's Day" and why it is awesome and awesomely stupid at the same time.
• Datacenter Transformer: A tale of woe from some crazy-ass electrical problem and superbad preparation and handling at MIT IS&T.

Well, it's an official snow emergency in the city of Boston. Also, according to Universal Hub, the French Toast alert level is "High" -- Orange.

Ike Turner died yesterday, at the ripe old age of 76. The New York Post article headline:

IKE 'BEATS' TINA TO DEATH

You stay classy, New York Post.

From the the part of the country where they refer to carbonated beverages as "pop":

(taken at a local grocery store earlier this afternoon)

O'Reilly book author, Leonard Richardson, has written an awesomely hilarious analysis of the book "Future Stuff." The book was published back in 1989, and had all sorts of predictions about 250 consumer products that should have been available by the year 2000. While the book does succeed in making a few valid predictions (Flat TV, HDTV, Memory Card Camera), and several near misses (Virtual World, Smart TV, Digital Audiotapes, Movies delivered over the telephone), it's even more interesting to see where it completely misses the boat.

Apparently back in 1989, even though we had computers, nobody could foresee that they could become general purpose devices. One of the biggest themes running through the list of future predictions is that they all end up requiring separate doo-dads and black boxes that would plug into your TV or telephone. So, yes it turns out that now we can have movies delivered electronically to us on demand, as the book predicts, but instead of over the phone line to a "special box plugged into your tv", we can do it over this thing we call the internet, and can use the computers that we all already have. Same goes for something called the "voice activated typewriter" or something they refer to as an "electronic newspaper."

Another amusing item is something called the "Smart TV." It appears to be similar to a tivo, but runs on a jukebox of VHS tapes. Awesome! And remember VCR Plus+? These days it's built into VCRs (who still has a VCR?), but back in the day, it was actually a separate box that controlled your VCR tuner and recording commands via an IR blaster.

So go and check it out. While you're there, also read the comments on predicted items such as "The Intelligent Toilet", "The More Intelligent Toilet", and of course, "The Most Intelligent Toilet."

And here we have the founder of the free software movement, creator of GNU, emacs, etc, etc, legendary crusader Richard M. Stallman, cranking it on the "dot" at MIT -- thus contributing to one of the most annoying youtube/internet memes of all time.

Wow.

From the depths of not-recently-blogging, comes this bit of awesomeness, pointed out to me by a co-worker. The Playmobil Security Checkpoint. Be sure to read all of the comments/reviews.

Some gems:

• This is great learning too for young brownshirts. I am waiting for a few accessories though, kids size jackboots and a toy Taser. Think how much fun that will be for your young Martin Bormann types. I envision a low voltage say 5KV instead of 50kv to give a realistic but non-hazardous jolt. Next we can have a nice Nerf Nightstick and little Heinrich can have great start getting ready for his future job with the TSA, local police force or the new STASI ( Secure Transportation And Safety Inititive) Be the first on your block. I also look forward to the upcoming Halliburton Play detention center real simulated barbed wire.
• I was a little disappointed when I first bought this item, because the functionality is limited. My 5 year old son pointed out that the passenger's shoes cannot be removed. Then, we placed a deadly fingernail file underneath the passenger's scarf, and neither the detector doorway nor the security wand picked it up. My son said "that's the worst security ever!". But it turned out to be okay, because when the passenger got on the Playmobil B757 and tried to hijack it, she was mobbed by a couple of other heroic passengers, who only sustained minor injuries in the scuffle, which were treated at the Playmobil Hospital. The best thing about this product is that it teaches kids about the realities of living in a high-surveillence society. My son said he wants the Playmobil Neighborhood Surveillence System set for Christmas. I've heard that the CC TV cameras on that thing are pretty worthless in terms of quality and motion detection, so I think I'll get him the Playmobil Abu-Gharib Interogation Set instead (it comes with a cute little memo from George Bush).

Also, check out the "People who Bought Items Like This Also Bought..." rig. Dianetics? WTF?

Here's a blast from the recent past. One of my favorite commercials ever.

"This is kinda awesome..."
"I just want to make an omelet!"

And now, some phrases that have crept into my vocabulary from either my own life experiences, my work, or my friends. Enjoy these shared bits of english-language awesomeness:

• Schtonky: In some circumstances, anything that is cool/awesome can be referred to as schtonky. More specifically, schtonk is a measure of some mixture of class, formality, masculinity, and old-timeyness. For example, a fine tobacco pipe carries very high schtonk value, as would any wood-paneled room with a fireplace where leather-bound books are. Snoop-doggy-dog dressed up as a pimp driving around in a '64 Impala is also quite schtonky, as is anything to do with Frank Sinatra, or the rat pack. Wal-Mart is not schtonky.




• Janky: Something that is constantly near the boundry of working and being broken is janky. But being janky is more than that. Pretty much every one of the crazy electronic / audio / mechanical projects we built in college was janky. Something that is janky but still working carries with it a certain amount of pride and charm. At MIT, on 2ndwest at east campus, the PTZ Audio Network is decidedly janky -- random bits of audio cable strewn between points on the hall tied in with various transformers and ancient audio amplifiers that sometimes work.




• To have a stew going on / to be preparing a stew: A stew is a nice warm bowl of goodness. Metaphorically, for someone to have a stew on means that they are settling into and/or enjoying a bit of awesomeness. This is somewhat hard to define. An example would be hanging out with friends and enjoying several alcoholic beverages -- you would say: "We're hanging out here, there's quite a stew going on." Other activities, such as enjoying a day at the beach, taking a nice vacation, having a gourmet dinner, watching a marathon of your favorite TV show, going clubbing, etc. may also be considered "stew-like."




• Torqued up: This one's fairly easy to understand. Anytime someone is stressed out about something, or getting worked up about anything, it's like they are twisting themselves and building negative energy. This is much like when you twist a rubber band around itself, or any item that can store torque, so let's call it being torqued up.




• Degauss: If you're torqued up about something, you need to degauss. Back in the day, we used to have CRT monitors with "de-gauss" buttons built in to allow us to somehow release magnetic energy or whatever. It made a satisfying "fwongggggggg!" noise when pressed. People can degauss in several ways. One good way to de-gauss would be to get a stew going (see above).




• Cleaning the Basement: When you're spending all sorts of time and energy doing unnecessary preparation work before starting on the thing you really need to be doing, that's known as "cleaning the basement." Back when I used to be a home-owner, I would insist on making sure the basement was clean and well-organized before dealing with clean-up projects on the main floor. Ostensibly, this was to make sure that anything that was going to be moved from the main floor down to the basement would go in a reasonable place and not just get thrown in a pile.




• Bikeshedding / Painting the bike shed: When trying to solve a complex problem or deal with a crisis, it's important to focus on what's important. If you're planning and building your dream estate, or remodeling your home, there's no reason to waste too much time and energy deciding what color the bike shed is going to be and giving it several magnificent coats of paint. Bikeshedding is a popular activity in groups. When solving a problem, or working on a project, everyone will argue about what color the bike shed should be rather than directing focus on solving the problem at hand.

Dear Lord, this song and music video by Russian rockers ANJ is made of win. It is so full of awesome that it just might blow up your computer and set your entire internet connection ablaze with the heat of a thousand former-soviet ICBMs. And no, I'm not just saying this because I *heart* Mikhail Gorbachev -- the first and only president of what we now call the "former Soviet Union," and winner of the Nobel Peace Prize in 1990.

From the creator:
I did this video for a Russian Metal Band called ANJ. It is pretty crazy. When I saw the lyrics it seemed to be an earnest tribute to Mikael Gorbachov (that's how the Russians spell it), so I was a bit confounded about what the video concept should be, but then I had a brainstorm to take it way over the top and I think it was just the thing. Suffice to say it's half Russian History allegory as told through an old zombie movie made in the Soviet Union, and half animated Soviet Propaganda posters. It's in HD, so let it load a bit before you play it and then click the little "four arrows" symbol on the lower right part of the viewer to see it in true HD.

GORBACHOV: THE MUSIC VIDEO - BIGGER AND RUSSIANER from Tom Stern on Vimeo.<